Don't you think facebook is a bit pretentious, suggesting friends and all? No facebook, I would NOT like to be friends with a girl whose fiancee I have slept with.
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
There's a transgender game of twister in the basement...God doesnt want me to type this paper.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Uhh, there's a legit bruise on my boob.. Again how does he manage this
the last guy with this job had a bookshelf fall on him. He's in the Er. Im high and they gave me his shift. How do you think i feel?
It's like a bag of dicks covered in taint sweat pounding a pregnant baby walrus.
I left my pipe in my center console with a bowl packed when I took my car to the shop, and when I picked it up the weed had been smoked, but my oil change was only half price.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
Judging by my bruises, I know I took more than one tumble. I probably pulled u down w me, and then punched you in the knee. Been trying to find a place to fix my phone between naps today. Almost no place accepts hand js as currency these days. 2013 is gonna be expensive and whorey.
I just want to like fall into a pit of hot wings beside a keg of yingling and eat my way to freedom
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
I'm sorry about all of the innappropriate shoe throwing
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
Roomies told me I showed up to my house alone with no pants on and burrs in my hair... I live in the middle of the city
Randomize