I think I'm in Tiajuana
You are not in Tijuana. I saw you an hour ago
I could be
Its about making memories worth repressing
he proceeded to punch 3 mailboxes in a row and when i asked him why, he said "because they were talking shit"... i need a new boyfriend. and a new life.
No. Do you know how much this carpet cost? If she comes over, you put down towels this time. i'm so not kidding.
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
i really regret not blowing your cousin before he went to jail
Hey if there is a better reason to go drink then "I've been fucking robbed!" I have yet to hear one. Also, I've been fucking robbed.
Just heard my neighbor say "I'm just gonna lay down in a coma until someone comes into my room and hands me a beer." He's got his priorities straight
Traded my phone for pizza, then got it back this morning....successful night
I'm in this weird masturbatory haze making onion rings. If you want to come over we can eat these suckers and play TF2.
Why don't we hang out more often?
Best walk of shame ever. Wearing a bright purple onesie, covered in smudged childrens make up, carrying my shoes and 1/4 sac of goon. I swear every house I walked past had an elderly couple watering their garden just to watch me
I'm so hungover I just peed on my hand and left it, didn't wash... Killin it in 2915
I'm trying to get weird tonight. Like I want to see bitches crawling on all fours drinking milk from bowls and shit by 5 am. You down?
when I found u, u were using a t-shirt for pants
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