So I think I might still secretly love him despite the ass licking...
Hey ass licking is a very nice and intimate thing! Don't discredit your feelings
But what if he licks everyones ass?
I was taking a piss and started puking. I pissed myself and made a mess in the bathroom. Passed out, then got up and went back out from 11pm to 5am.
I changed 4 diapers and slept horribly in our hot apt. Now, I'm at my inlaws house watching the Rangers get pummeled. Oh how our lives differ.
This is the kind of period I feel I should name out of respect to the fact I might have just gotten lucky this time.....
where are my pants?
you were passing out with two blankets and the person next to you was cold so you gave him your pants to keep warm
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
Nothing on google about my condom issue. However, if you get a chance google: condom with teeth.
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
We were sitting in a hot tub debating how drunk we could get by osmosis if we kept spilling our drinks in it. This is what engineering college does to you.
Happy birthday, you long dick monster
Apparently we don't communicate very well unless we're drunk and/or naked
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
What is my life coming to that I have to cross state lines to get laid?
Getting a UTI was SO NOT on my wishlist for the holidays
Man I gotta stop stashing shit when I'm high. I just spent 2 hours searching for my bag of pot and eventually found it in fucking a bandaid box.
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
Randomize
