the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I guess the cop knew i was on a walk of shame and felt bad...i got to play with the siren the rest of the way home
I tapped out to boredom. She bought me a full meal at Subway. Two tap beers and a pretty weak long island iced tea. I'm five dollars cheaper to fuck than she is.
I used puppy pads next to the couch for her to throw up on....
We are not on the "bring me breakfast" level. He's bringing me penis if I ask for breakfast too I'll just sound greedy
Do I need to take a photo of my sister's enlarged and disgustingly dark nipples to scare you into protection? DO I?
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
He's such a champ. He puked on purpose just so he'd be coherent enough to roll this blunt
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
You seriously knocked all the beer off the table, broke the beer pong table, broke the bar and kept yelling "you have to warn me first!" all because I wouldn't let you have another four loco
DO NOT SLAP ANYONE WITH ANY VEGAN MEAT PATTIES
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
