We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
so are you any less fat since you started doing blow?
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I'll tell these girls I'm like the pet adoption center...don't play with it if you're not taking it home.
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
He also informed us that it's rude to shove your tit in someone's mouth. Happy Monday.
So watch family guy till our brains melt and then bang till our bodies hurt?
Sorry I didn't take you making out with him all night as a hint you wanted nothing to do with him...
the only good thing about going home with him was that he was prettier than me.
Not much, just taking another sorting hat quiz while waiting for this porno to finish buffering
He said we would have a beautiful daughter together. That way too much for a one night stand...
This feels more like a conference of all the people I've fucked in the past year.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
LACE UP YOUR GODDAMN SHOES
N O
Randomize
