Important detail I forgot to tell you: leprechaun loves david bowie.
Since my computer broke, i've been masterbating to girls gone wild. I feel like i'm in the 90's.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
he just started chanting dark meat! dark meat! out of no where.
He adopted an old drug sniffing dog so that he won't lose his weed around the house anymore. It works.\n
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
My costume for the end of the world party was a success. Everyone in the ER thought I was there because I got hit by a car when it was actually from alcohol poisoning.
That's awesome and prob the first time you had an idea of what to do. I'm super proud of you Chelz
Its cos im stoned ! My high self is maturing
my dad has now seen 6 different dudes grab my ass. i guess i should start a list.
I told you I missed you and you said you missed me as much as you miss a urinary tract infection. I get it. You're still mad.
but seriously, an anthropology paper shouldn't be hard if you're trashed, right?
You were pretty conviced that my dog was a spanish child and kept trying to read him the news from your iphone app
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
I'm seriously scared right now. Woke up next to 3 geese and a lot of feathers ..
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