Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
ok this is the part where i go up stairs and pass out incoherently untill 6 30 tommaorw morning and not rember any of this. love youuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
why did u have a candy cane hung on your dick in the first place?
she has a santa fetish
cute.
Just had a serious bathroom emergency at walmart a and it appears that i ate a taco bell burrito wrapper last night
So when you said you wanted to make a clay replica of my boobs and hang it above your bed you actually meant it?
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
Its not that I don't mind giving her as much as my penis as she wants, its the post sex cigarette I have to supply. Shits $9 a pack.
Put a tip jar next to your bed from now on.
Your good ideas are reason #4 we need to live together.
After 3 dates I think I'm failing at painting the "sweet guy with a future" picture and more painting the "this is the guy to call when you've run out of options and want to get fucked in half drunk to forget about it" picture.
All I have done at work today is eat and try to get my coworker to tie me to his bed again
Hey texans ride hard. He should have known what he was in for when I asked to sit on his face. The broken nose was a BADGE he just earned.
I'll be home next weekend. Its mothers day. Let's party just enough so we are frightened it might be our first
GOOGLE HAS JUST RELEASED AN UPDATE THAT ALLOWS YOU TO CATCH POKEMON USING MAPS. Pack your shit, our time has COME.
he accidentally put it in my ass, i liked it but didn't tell him that and "accidentally" took his weed.
I just bumped into this random I hooked up with a few years ago at Steve's party. Talk about a fingerblast from the past!
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