To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
it's like sucking your thumb. only its not yours. and its a penis.
if being creepy is wrong, then i don't want to be right
he threw up on me, hugged my legged and then started laughing. when i asked him why, he said "it's like the sour patch kids commercials."
Pretty much gone. He was in the backseat and kept whispering that his "toes felt like pigtails"
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
plus shes a stripper, ive been with strippers, if you fuck this up your penis will never forgive you
We got a kitchen table so we would eat together more. So far we've played drunken monopoly and had sex on it.
You have to sext the same way you right a resume, you can only use active verbs
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I don't think it's food poisoning, I think it's cause you cooked it over burning styrofoam
I have a gay crossdressing neighbor that's dresses up as a slutty pirate. 6 beers from now I would have hit on him. I hate halloween.
I partied with 2 slutty ninja turtles from Sweden last night, I Love Halloween.
How was your night?
Fell down a flight of stairs. Went to a sex dungeon. Was approached by a man in a leather harness.
What does it mean when the bartender gives you 4 straws?
You think you can just send me a picture of your dick and everything will be ok?
Yep.
Randomize
