She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
I knocked on some strangers door, you didn't have to give me a fake hotel room number
Did I at antime last saturday slip away and sign up for a prayer circle?
finally remembered how I know that chick in my history class. she made and fed me ramen when I was wasted!
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
WHY did you say no to the sex seance?
The bouncer was just about to kick Sarah out for getting with this guy 'too physically'. I told him that was 'her style' and he let them stay. Banter.
We went rollerblading down high street singing "Free Falling"in ketchup and mustard costumes. A car full of guys drove by and yelled out their window "Need a hot dog with that?!" Naturally, we woke up at their apartment.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
First Peyton Manning retires, and now the most interesting man in the world is retiring for Dos Equis. This is the worst week of my fucking life.
I sat on his face and watched Mean Girls. It was a good date.
My condom drawer is now filled with W-2s and tax return documents. Is this adulting?
There is a couple fucking in the outback bathroom and at first I thought it was sick but than I remembered my Outback fantasy with you and decided I can't pass judgements.
I have 2 bottles of wine, a sharpie, and a panda mask and don't have to wake up early. Can u do the math on this?
Randomize