Just figured out why my bed smells like weed: I just found a bowl in my pillow case?
the guy next to me needed a pen, so I let him take one from my book bag. my panties are now being passed around the class...thank you for telling me you hid them in my bookbag.
If only guys knew how much awkward ass shaving goes into making sex this good...
Just want you to know I am def drunk enough to burn down your house. Don't worry I checked the stove like 6 times. I love grilled cheese
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
I can't even type what I drank. I'll throw up
donating our bodies to science does not justify what were doing to them.
Why would you hook up with someone whos known for peeibg in someones mouth
Can I color on your dick again?
Do you always skip to "Baby Got Back" when fat girls show up at the bar?
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
This is the perfect outfit to do ketamine in, I must say
Somehow I woke up next to the bouncer who kicked us out of the bar last night...
I've seriously never been more thankful for marijuana and my resting bitchface.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
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