she was so ugly that the sight of her made me shiver and then i had to play it off like a draft blew by that only i felt.
I just found out that AAA will pick you up if you're drunk for free if you're a member. How did I not know about this?
Day 3. Will have to postpone job hunting by a month. May have blown out my knee. Was sunburned on Friday. Now look painted red. Still alive. All worth it.
sometimes you have to go after what you want
true. and i really want to cum
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
Just found a bottle of tequila in the washer.
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
You know it's bad when I can already feel tomorrow's hangover before even drinking today.
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Dude. That Grinch had his priorities right when he was worried that there might be a cash bar at that town celebration.
All I got was pictures of my boss and dicks. So, that was the end of snapchat.
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
As long as it's before midnight it's cool. But it would be understandable to ring in my new year shitting myself just before I go to Iraq.
Randomize