He started to lick my mole,thinking it was my nipple.
I'm not crazy, I only keep calling you cause you won't pick up.
So there is a guy driving a robot around the college of engineering selling energy drinks
According to the transitive property, he has now had dick in his mouth.
My cleaning lady just walked in the kitchen and i had a hardcore boner. I dont know what awkward is anymore
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Dude it's bad when your 10 year old son makes fun of your penis size.
My vagina is screaming your name . Wtf did you do to it
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
Just puked in front of a high school tour group. Based on the standing ovation, we have a solid group of freshman coming in this fall.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
PROBABLY?!! And here I was, about to buy you a glow-in-the-dark banana-flavored cock ring... Now I "probably" won't.
Looking back at our past texts, the minute it turned 2020 you were cleaning your house and I was dying of the cold. We were prophesying the Rona.
Randomize
