very cute, but more "I wanna put you in my pocket and keep you as a pet" and less "please bang me" type of cute.
If your 8 lb baby was ham it would serve 6-8 people
We were drinking cognac with TAB. I felt like trailer park royalty.
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
I'm having horrible flashbacks of being groped by Pauly Shore.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Its been 4 years since I have masturbated this hard. God bless the Olympics!
Hey. There is naked girl with "plz don't touch her. She just turned 21" sharpied on her chest. What happened last night?
Woke up, moved an empty handle of fireball to spit blood, then put the morning cigarette out in it.
Hooking up with him was lovely.. but waking up in his bed the next morning and finding double stuffed oreos... I mean.... I won
This girl I interned with got engaged today and I'm just like over here taking plan B with my tacos and PBR.
I'd help you out but I got Bacardi and Tequila poured down my snorkel last night and I'm still drunk
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
Black labs can get you to do pretty much anything...even approach strange men in their bath robes
I keep worrying the police are going to come looking for us.
For which one? Starting a fire on my porch or having sex on my porch?
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