so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
We got a party bus for the nite. I found out the hard way why stripper poles are meant for girls.
I knew shit got real when the pinapple was gone and people were just passing around the core and gnawing on it.
It was only 12:11 and I needed to make a Pepto Latte and call it a night, I don't remember that being part of my new years resolution.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
You sent me a picture of you holding a goat then asked me if I would have day sex
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
I opened the door, threw up on the street, wiped my mouth and flashed a thumbs up to all of the cars behind us and kept on driving
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
I’ll always remember that day you sent me that random nude on accident lmao changed my life
you don't need to worry about using proper grammar if you're asking for the size of his dick.
Randomize
