Next time, if you wake and bake, make sure you nail the wake part. Not easy to explain to mum. Or the fire brigade.
Just puked in a mcdonalds cup while driving. Didn't even swerve.
Someone just proposed in Subway. Trying not to laugh.
i lost virginity while listening to candy shop. something in my life has finally gone right.
He doesn't like you, he likes u not having a gag relfex
he described going down on me as being like 'entering a jungle of deliciousness and fur
He told me he's not in to anal. I need to marry him, ASAP.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
How are you feeling?
I mean, shattered dignity aside, not bad.
He made me come so hard I punched another hole in the wall mid orgasm.
I'm not fixing this one for you. Do it your own damn self.
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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