her lazy eye was starring daggers at me.
This may sound mean but have u ever just sat in class and look at some of the the people and think how disappointed their parents must be
his blackberry tasks were 1. take names and 2. kick ass
just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Just talked to Kate. She said I called her on Friday night. She said I was crying for 5 minutes because we were parked in front of a fire hydrant.
Sat in the shower and reenacted the "Wiggle your big toe" scene from Kill Bill. THAT hungover.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Sorry I can't go bowling with you guys. I'm getting daytime dick. That's the best kind.
I invited you and you fucked me in the face with the penis of disappointment and shit.
soo...what's the appropriate way to ask to come over and take your S&M lingerie out of your ex's apartment? big weekend planned, kinda need it.
Told my prof I have mono so that he won't judge me when I show up hungover and looking like shit to class every day.
Just skip
Please. i have SOME standards
And thanks to you I'm pretty sure I'm banned from every qdoba in south carolina. And cab company
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
