And I just threw up at the table during Mother's Day Brunch.
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
was this before of after we tobbganned into that tree?
He tied my whole arm, in its cast, to the headboard first. He mumbled something about safe, sane, and consensual?
I can't believe we had "50th anniversary of man in space" sex.
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
Best elective surgery ever. Having a great time ignoring girls' pleas to pull out and blowing it inside anyway. I like to watch them absolutely freak out and go batshit crazy for 20 mins before I mention the snip-snip surgery. Power trip.
They drank shots out of my cleavage. Surprisingly, the one who did the best was a gay guy.
I've said it before and I'll say it again: your tits are a danger to gay men everywhere.
Fair enough. I'm gonna finish off half a bottle of Brunettes in the shower anf relive the good ol' days. We need a reunion
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Seriously though, passing out on the police station floor must have been priceless!
There they were doing the deed on the beach, looked like two seagulls fighting over a chicken bone.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
Randomize
