and then I told her I was too drunk. She started to cry, and told me this always happens to her and that she thinks shes ugly. I pretended I was asleep and then she farted.
This girl is more easily done than said...
Yeah, she'd be cute...but she has faith. It's a problem down south.
The only thing he got me during our relationship was a cum stain in my backseat. I choose winners.
He smothers me through text. I can't even image what he'd be like in person.
There is no excuse for watching a Jesse McCartney movie.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
You spent most of the night crying and throwing leftover meatballs at the neighbors dogs
He's hungover and at the neighbour's garage sale negotiating a price for a tuba.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
How old am I that I had to sneak a boy out of my room this morning...
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
You know that gay bartender? Not as gay as we thought.....
Is it sad the checkout lady had to inform my mom she can't buy alcohol before 8am?
I was pretty pissed in the morning when I realized he had fucked the fake tattoo right off my chest.
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