i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
he was so nervous about his first time.. it was like michael j. fox trying to put on a condom...
I think I could pass a breathalyzer. But with like a C.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
drunk waterpark is besst waterpark.
I wanna throw up and cum in that order
someone to text and fuck? since when does that constitute a relationship?
since 2006
can't believe I traded a good night's sleep and a midterm for your blurry tits
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
Hey I was just wondering if you could go look for my teeth?
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
I can insert a female catheter, but I cannot grill a cheese.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
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