I don't think he has that. His apartment was pretty much a tv and a bed. Topless girl calendar and a glass of water to put out cigarettes.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
I thought pig tail meant you were suppose to grab on to it when getting BJ
Afterwards she kept poking it and saying "it looks so sad and small" I dont know if I wanted to reach this state in our relationship...
I just canoed to the bar. I am a skilled drunk paddler.
your blue lips and tongue was their first indication you were probably underage
HEY THERE IS NO AGE LIMIT ON BLUE SLUSHIES
I'm gonna do some tripping... In the direction of balls
I'm just gonna wear a long dress with no panties today. My pussy needs a break.
So it turns out that my mom and her dad used to hook up when they were our age
Never been so glad that I look so much like my dad that there's no question as to my paternity
The fact that he said "there's nothing wrong with being a raging drunk, just ask my mother." has me thinking that I have no positive role-models among my friends.
She said "I feel like I haven't reached my full potential" and I couldn't figure if she meant in life or with the weed..
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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