I had to remind him that there is no "age exchange rate" between the u.s. and spain, and that 16 will always equal 16
I can't be the first person ever who had to explain why her bottle of orange juice had a picture of a screwdriver drawn on it
I had to drink a couple beers this morning so I could attend the keg race. Hangover had to dissipate or it wasn't happening.
Skip school. Seven hour blow job Plus Disney movies. Day of champions
We just had father kitten bonding time .. I was on the toilet , he was climbing the animal print shower curtain . It was magical
You asked him for a membership to him and his dick.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
PUT YOUR FRESHLY SHAVED MEXICAN POON ON THAT BEARD. NOW.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
the bartender knew what was up when i took a sip of my drink, gagged and asked her to water down my water
MY HAND WILL BE UP HIS ASS IF HE DOES NOT APOLOGIZE FOR WHAT HE DID. IT WON'T BE THE GOOD-FEELING KIND OF "HAND-UP-ASS" EITHER.
Well now you know... If you can get over the awkward... The dick is 10 min away.
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
So I figured it out. There's two types of shitters. Moaners and grunters. And on occasion there's a third. It's the ill fabled grunt moaner.
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize