i thought i was pinching her nipple. It was her mole
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
her bridesmaids come in huge, huger, wtf, and free willy. all their gown are strapless. its like watching the Hindenburg waddle down the isle.
He posted on my wall. Idk if I'm ready for that big of a commitment.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
If I drank a glass of water for every drink I had I'd die of water intoxication like some tweaked out looser at a rave
Due to your tardiness, I'm saving you my tab
the last thing i remember was the norwegian kid tacking a bag of wine to the ceiling, then boom! shower drain.
I got picked up after "I just threw up in my face". Then I had very specific instructions involving the bathtub.
Just sitting here contemplating the meaning of life.
So you're drunk waiting for the bus.
I feel like my dick pic collection should be archived at the Smithsonian
I am so stoned. And there are so many white people in this Jack in the Box.
Randomize