just come out here and I will go home with you...
He looks like Jesus, if Jesus had let himself go.
I just heard a teenager say to his friend "dats my baby! i was hittin her up on myspace like gurllll. she got me steamin". must have missed the memo its 2005 and we still use myspace.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
He just referred to himself as a sharp shooter. I had sex with that.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
Sorry I don't make house calls. You wanna get blown you come over here. It's like rock paper scissors but vagina ALWAYS beats penis
If we could give a gymnastic score to drunken nights, I would be a part of the Fab Five.
Banged my ex-wife last night...so I belong to that club now.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
You know you've been having sex for 9 months when you do Rock Paper Scissors for who has to go on top
Tanner. All u drink. 10 bckaa. Locked in Porto potty outside. Constructed area. Main strrrreeeett. Fuck. Help. Pleese
Randomize
