Me too. Send a cab. Order food.
Fact: Godrick looks like David Archuleta
I love family holidays its the only time when playing beer pong, and smoking hookah with my family isnt looked down upon
i am devastated. she was DTF and I was about to puke, i told her to wait outside my room for a second. Puked. Passed out woke up, she was gone. Found puke stains on my keyboard that seem to spell out youporn....
As I was buying milk at the market, the lady at the checkstand said, "what? No alcohol today?" have I really earned THAT reputation?
Pre-St Patricks Day Log: Threw up across a 14ft radius, this is why the irish dont drink tequila
she peed on how many people?
I know and I love you for your valets putting your thong on your seat
Well, when he's back from China he's probably gonna be pissed I used the spare key he gave me to prove to everyone I'm fucking an NBA player. We took all his booze too.
we're in NC now and so far we've smoked a blunt in every state with the exception of Tennessee which we accidentally went to
party devolved into two exes battling with Cal's tiki torches, and the lawn being set on fire kinda sorta and then we all hula'ed... hulaed?
You punched me in the face while blackout. 20 min later I told you I'd been punched in the face and you yelled 'by who, imma go kill 'em!'
I just took a picture of Austin's dick wearing a hat. Except its not a hat it's a DayQuil cap.
The cop was standing next to me when I texted "haha" to your phone...didn't realize that he had taken it already...
I woke up under the kitchen table. Andy is cursing out Joe Exotic's name in between heaves in the bathroom. Jay is trying to sleep w/ a shirt tied over his eyes. Lena and Brad braved the sun to go get bloody mary supplies and food. I'd say the Tiger King drinking game was a success.
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