She has HUUUUUUUGE nipples
I have a feeling that after last night, i'm not just going to hell. i'm going to hell on a full scholarship. free admission bitches
I just let someone steal something bc they were so fucking weird and wouldn't leave me alone
I just got three quarters of the way there before I realized I was way too stoned for class so I bought a smoothie and walked home.
it's amazing how much more room there is in my purse when I'm not carrying alcohol in it
Sorry about your blender, your tiolet, your weed, and your dog...
I'm eager to hear this explaination.
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
True fear is being unable to remember where you hid your weed and vibrator in your parent's house.
You sending me our unborn, unfertilized babies' names is not what I envisioned when you said you'd "drunk text me later".
What’s the level of adulting when you reschedule a dentist appointment to have a threesome?
I told my mom that I might be hungover today so she needs to make me an omelet.. it happened and I'm happy
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