Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
On friday while at the hotel bar by myself (creepy) I made friends w/ a millionaire who said he may be running for the position of mayor in richmond va (likely a lie). At one point during our discourse he asked if I was crazy. In the effort of full disclosure I looked him in the eye and said yes
I don't know what prompted his inquiry, clearly this man had impeccable intuition
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
Planned Parenthood should have gift certificates.
His penis was definitely too big to be the type that wants commitment. Shit.
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Puked in the hotel lobby and just kept walking. I love mardi GRAS.
Bouncy castle Catalina wine-mixer race for the cure. It will be as fun as it sounds
Just took a shot out of a used mini planter. Might die from the pesticides, but didnt want whoever took all of my shotglasses to think they won.
He scratched off my spray tan. Literal nail marks down my back. Can't imagine what's underneath his fingernails.
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
I wore a shirt that says "more tequila" to my bday party last year and that's why I want to be my own friend
He used the term 'cock-staggering' in an email. So needless to say things are going pretty well.
I masterbated poison ivy onto my penis, it hasn't been this upset with me since the Take one for the team fiasco of 02.
i need something from you. video yourself doing naked jumping jacks and send it to me. it will make me smile
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