It was an igloo shaped doghouse, I was obligated to hotbox it
I'm out of vodka and money. My semester is officially over. The way I see it, my finals are just forms I need to fill out in order to leave campus.
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
you just kept bragging about how there was a "pretty large" chance that you had pooped on the same toilet as George Clooney
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
I'm drunk at a gay bar with my riding crop. God save the queens
I would steal a car if I knew it had wheat thins in it
is it necessary to steal the whole car?
If I ever write a memoir I'm thinking "Choosing to sit in a vat of shit" would fit
U just kept yelling her vagina wasn't a priority bc u had a bowl of cheerios calling your name
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Slept in and having coffee. No sounds of whipping and no veiny dildos next to me. This is good. How's your mornin?
Randomize
