Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
She just called to say she can support a full bottle of vodka between "the girls" now. I'm going over, don't try and stop me.
other than the jail part I had a really good time with you
I kind of feel like BP. I'm dressed in green and absolutely horrible for the environment.
Just had the best random sex ever with a girl I picked up from a pro choice rally uptown. God bless the Democratic National Convention.
I honestly think she should have her own reality show called "Lowering the Bar" and it consists of a camera crew following her from Bar to bar hooking up with unsuspecting drunk attractive men.
OMFG "ASS" JUST STARTED PLAYING ON MY PHONE VIA PANDORA AS IM IN THE CAR WITH A CONGRESSMAN FUCKKKK
And he listens to me when I talk to him like the hulk.
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
I finally got my restraining order in the mail. Was that supposed to upset me? I'm just over here like "TELLEM BOY BYE!-\nlegally..."
They have one of those claw machines here... with a dildo in it...
I'm literally about to create a tinder account. Just so someone drives me to get food.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
Randomize
