Are you drinking alone?
no, i'm watching house
That doesn't count.
wtf, then i'm always alone
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
Its time to go balls to the wall to get any good D during these last few weeks of college.
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
I bought him bourbon as a thank you for his apology. What is wrong with me?
She kept throwing quarters at him and yelling "Goooaaallll!!" whilst taking her clothes off one by one. I'd say she had a good night
I'm tellin ya, let the nipple get some air, they'll hire u on the spot, lawyers love a little nip
A little sexual choking never killed anyone. And if it did, they died happy.
To be honest I've become too lazy for the work involved in getting laid.
You run marathons and you're too lazy for sex? Priorities, man.
Touche.
I can't masturbate without laughing really hard at some point and it's entirely your fault.
I just lectured my ex boyfriend on how to eat a girl out what has my life come to
You said if the geese can walk on the lake so can I.
I'm writing to thank you for your never ending commitment to my orgasms and also to apologize if any physical harm was done due to your impressive efforts. Hopefully the sex and post sex pizza made up for it.
Remember I am not doing blow tonight. I REPEATE NO COCAINE unless I do it with your mom
Reverse road head. Sa-witch!!!
Randomize