Bad news is im a slut again. Good news is its with people ive been a slut with before.
she asked if mt Rushmore was natural or man made
And then as he was trying to conceal his boner from everybody, you said aloud "just grab your cock and get out of the pool"
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Didn't get the job. Searched for my references on FB and saw the pic of me weighing my head passed out.
God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels
Oh man, buzzed lunch fridays almost got out of hand.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I told the cop to try walking in heels and he'd understand why I was walking home without then on. He told me he only does that on Wednesdays.
They just showed up to the party with a shopping cart full stolen of naty ice cans, no boxes, just cans. Shit just got real !
Commuter bitches be judging your sister and her bag fulla wine. It's a motherfucking rosé, bitch!
Well I either feel like the fat girl or very accomplished because his bed is now broken in three places
No like I actually peed on the treadmill. As it was running
it’s about to be september and all i keep thinking is what if i go (another) full calendar year without having sex?
Randomize
