If Jon and Kate can get divorced...how hard can it be for me?
I feel like I bought a front row ticket to watch her screw up her life
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Haha im Trying. This detox stuff tastes nasty. It's bad when the only thing that came to mind when i took the first sip was how good it would be with Vodka
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
We both paused during sex to do the clap during the Friends theme song. Soulmates.
I came out, you were peeing on the car and when I asked why you said it deserved it because its a rental
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
Well if you don't want to be kicked out before last call don't I would suggest stop drinking whiskey and don't call the giant bouncer with the neck tattoo "princess"
Dude...are you really going to start sexting during our friend's memorial service?
Got drunk in Atlantic City Flagged down some guy with two wrapped tampons like road flares for a cigarette.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
I'm waiting for your stupid pizza and this 400 lb drunk man is behind me singing the acapella version of Elevation by U2
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