i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
Am I the only one creeped out by the guy asleep behind our couch?
The girl who overdosed in the bathroom at work is back....help?
the easter KEGG...out of a drunken typo there arose a new and spectacular holiday tradition
There are regrets in my world today- mostly jager at that fucking altitude
I just found a video on my phone from last night of you yelling, "you can't fuck me!" at least 20 times
Drunk me Does not appreciate a drunk, naked you kicking me off the couch at 3am. You have a bed here, you dick
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
I never realized how weird our shower smells until I cracked a shower beer and had a familiar aroma to compare it to.
One door closes, one man cooks for you through the next open door
you grabbed the breathalyzer at dinner, blew a 0.20 and told the waitress you'd eat her ass
You're now part of the minority of friends who haven't seen my boobs.
I just feel like if we dated, he'd just be crying the entire relationship
he walked off and puked in the sand. then he made a sand castle over it so that "it wouldn't upset the kids"
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