...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
Omg. I bid $3000 on a cave in Afghanistan on EBay last night.
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
The homeless guy who goes through my garbage cans just gave me a flyer for an AA group.
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
I would just like to point out that a bandaid led to sex. The lesson here is always have a bandaid in your wallet.
1. so the new neighbor u called dibs on.. I'm sorry..but not really. 2. She lactates, I guess that happens when you have a kid less then 5 months ago.... WTF!! 3. Is it fucked up I'm craving Ceral & Milk now?
But I’m still curious to know... how did the homemade porno go?
Randomize