U know those big foam mats in the back gym for track?
ya, gonna go have sex there?
No I want one to have wings and pick me up and take me home
If I don't wake up snuggled up to 14 ice cream sandwiches, my life is incomplete.
haha the sad thing is i can't decide whats worse. the fact that you're drunk judging a science fair or the fact that i'm really proud of you for it.
Didn't know what to wear so I ripped off my bed sheets and tied myself a toga. "a little hungover" is no way to describe me right now.
Curled up in the fetal position, trying not to throw up or think about my future, and humming songs from musicals to myself. You?
You puked on the bar then proceeded to walk out. I told the bartender some girl walked up, puked and left and he gave me a free drink. Hope you got home safe.
he puked all over my guest bed and the said he felt good enough to clean it up. he poured bleach all over the bed and passed out in it. he had the chemiacal burn for a month...
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
I'm so hungover I can't taste anything
I have no inclination to even want to think about what God's existential meltdown is going to be like. O.o
The girl I was Skype sexing just asked for a moment of silence for robin Williams.
You wanna know what I want to eat? Questionable Mexican food before I go drink. Makes for excitement. Will I puke it up or shit my pants
There's something empowering about being at dinner and sitting across the table from two men you've blown.
Aww well I’m kinda unsober so probably best
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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