Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
It only happened twice. Once we used extra virgin olive oil and once I used saliva and brute force.
he sent me a naked picture of himself. things got awkward really quickly. but on a positive note he shaved his chest
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
Day 5 without masturbation. Fat chicks are back on the table
apparently dick flashing is a frowned upon sport here..... sorry girlfriends mom
I don't know how we managed to stay up but we actually sat in front of her open refrigerator for god knows how long while she ate salami straight out of the package with her fingers and I laughed. It was a trainwreck.
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
So don't be alarmed when you go into your bathroom, he's sleeping in the tub with your brothers dinosaurs. also I'll clean up the sticky floor later. (you don't wanna know)
We were watching sports center while I blew him so we could see the football highlights. I missed fall
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I went to work hungover and threw up in the break room. Told them I was pregnant and then said I quit. I don't have a job now, thanks vodka.
like don't tell me my baby smooth vag offended you
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
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