fyi, take the long route to the library. the "can i be your baby daddy?" homeless man migrated back for winter
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
I am highly attracted to the men and that's all i can say. I do not clap and make noises but i do turn to the side and say how i'd do incredible things to them if given the chance
I'm slowing backing away from her. I tried breaking up with her and it felt like I was clubbing baby seals.
She insisted on fucking on the futon mattress on the floor, answered the phone call from her boyfriend who was on his way to pick her up, and then had the audacity to ask if I was clean
And at least you didn't have a dinner of Ranch Pringles and Double Stuff Oreos. I forgot that part of being single.
Nope not happening. When I close my eyes the floor moves. I'm going to enjoy this free roller coaster.
Your heart is a swirling cauldron of blackness that does not pump blood but rather a sludgey mixture of evil and broken dreams.
definitely just forgot to put car in park in front of a police officer and ran into a bush.
Found a phone out last night at the bar. EPIC homemade porn vids on it!
Let me know. Show me one boob if yes. 2 if no
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
I never want to even look at fireball again because it reminds me of the night I died and then lived to tell the tale of how I died.
you thought the best thing to say to him was "you aint no fuckin cop"
just spent the last 20 minutes cleaning out the soap dispenser. fuck. me. adderall.
Randomize
