Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
After we were finished she said "That was like marriage sex". Should I take that as a compliment or insult?
I have a cut on my head from a tambourine.
I remember nothing except the fact it happened and I ate doritos and we highfived a lot
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Dude, you were dipping oreos in vodka and asking people to try it, "It's so good!"
Today is going to be the longest game of "was that a fart, or do I need to go wipe?" I have ever played. Maybe the most challenging too.
I fell asleep while studying last night and woke up smelling like whiskey and sex... words can not describe how confused I am
I feel like she is getting all kinds of bacterial exposure that may otherwise have been avoided had she been wearing pants
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
I'm pretty sure your ex of four years just had a baby with some kid and named it after you...
2017 is my year to realize stuff. Move over Kylie Jenner
When the nurses wouldn't let him smoke in the hospital he decided to just roll around on the floor.
Setting myself up for trouble? Yes. But getting laid is a lot more important at this time.
Randomize
