did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
I just made a milkshake without a blender... thats determination
Come see our sink grown plant.
She touched you, you're now contaminated for 48 hours. Please watch out for rashes, hives and STDs as she's known to have all three.
I mean, I'm not looking for prince charming. I'm looking for the glass slipper of dicks.
For looking exactly like her, she tasted less like her sister than I would've thought
Every time you started making out for him we all cheered for you... that's what sorority sisters do - they cheer you on when you make bad life decisions at the bar.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I found a video of myself completely naked on my phone giving a drunk tutorial on how to shit properly while blindfolded. Did you record it?
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
Tried to land my foot on his shoulder and kicked him in the face. Then I fell into a homeless man's bike and posed with a buffalo head. How was your night?
well he said my boobs made him believe in love at first sight so that's cool
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
I just had a man tell me he was going to think about me when he was fucking his wife tonight. This is my proudest moment as a gay.
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