he keeps dipping things in ranch and feeding them to me
Her name starts with A and ends with whore.
Fuck appropriateness.
Are they hot? And are the slutty? These are my concerns for any wedding. You say yes, and yes, I will be your best man
All I remember from my 21st is crying because the bouncer made him put his shirt back on
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
so the girl i've been sleeping with for 3 weeks now just figured out that i don't know her name
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I was taking a bath and he burst in, sat down and started taking a shit. RIGHT BESIDE ME. My lack of privacy astounds me.
I was passed out in a dog food bowl tor two hours. Just tapped my dinner beer. I love homecoming.
I am the kind of drunk to where i can still drive a golf cart
You could make a naked club. One member, you. One president, you.
So you were shitfaced and stole a fucking kayak?
He asked me how many starwars references he could make before i no longer find him attractive.
I dunno what to tell you sport. Short of having a shock collar on, you're gonna wanna hook up with people.
Randomize
