i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
we need to go to the store. i'm tired of having bud light for breakfast.
do you want me to pick up budweiser instead?
i wanted a birthday blowjob. not a birthday VD.
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
You were so high at Ikea last night that you were convinced you could speak Swedish. The whole the time you were our navigator and when we got to the cashier you were hitting on the lady. When she gave you her number you told her you were saving her number as Inglfurfta cuaue she must be swedish since she works there.
I'm drinking carlo rossi straight from the jug. I don't have any clean cups...how am I still at this point in my life...
Got another job?
If by job you mean clever way of getting free tattoos, then yes. I got another job.
All I'm saying is that if you have time for a 20 min shower bj you have time for me
You merely adopted the alcohol. I was born into it. Molded by it. I didn't see the hang over until I was a man and by then it was only blinding.
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I would definitely ride that dick into the sunset if nuggets are involved
Fortunatly we found him, he was on my roof. Unfortunatly, we can't say the same for his pants. Still looking. BRB.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
Randomize