you just stared at your feet and said some shit about the molecules dancing and how you had just solved physics.
I thought this kinda shit only happens to ugly people
She's helping me study for the final by writing the vocab words all over her body.
you drew a penis with ranch dressing. tried to take a picture of it and dropped your phone in it. Then made moaning sounds while you licked it off.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
Made out with a girl in a wheelchair and rode her around while I was blackout. On a new level.
I was dressed as bob Ross as this occurred
at which point he tried to give himself a prince albert piercing with the stapler on his desk.
I was on the verge of being completely over him and then he went and made his Instagram not private... ITS LIKE HE KNEW
Two of my roommates are waxing their vaginas in the living room. Can I come smoke?
that is either the most profound and meaningful thing i've ever heard, or someone got high before noon again.
You tried to use him as a battering ram. I'm 99% certain that's why he left.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
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