there is a large number of people floating in the fountains the morning in inter-tubes...its only 930. did i miss something?
The vibrator you gave me is probably the one thing I will never give up if we got robbed at gunpoint
I always know the weekend is over when the real license comes out and the fake goes back into the hiding spot.
Cocaine Wednesdays have to stop turning into no work Thursday
I should not be in class today. For the professors sake.
why is my forehead so bruised?
i found you outside knocking on the door with your head because you couldn't lift your arms.
I'm laying in bed with a case of beer,.. That's how this break up is going..
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I don't see how I managed to fuck up so much shit in an hour and a half..
Is it bad juju to glue mini budda to the bottom of a shot glass
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
When she saw "buy condoms" on my to do list she figured out pretty quick we were breaking up.
I think I'm still high. And I definitely still smell like lobster, so there's that
Omg. I checked my purse this morning and I'm pretty sure drunk me stole a frat guys tube of crest 3d white toothpaste. Like that's pretty fucked up but I think if I knew someone did that to me I'd probably still invite them over again cuz I'd be like, "this girl's creative, and has good hygiene."
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