Yeah we had sex for the first time last night and all the text he sent me afterwards said was “heh”
just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
you kept telling everyone that you were the mayor of silverware town
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Tell me you didn't have sex with my dad.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
Pot head idea of the day: make a maraca out of weed seeds. Or a rain stick? Definitely rain stick.
I gave up on alcohol forever for like 2 hours, that's got to be a new record
Also we saw a clown getting arrested. Rochester is weird.
I'm going home because your Crackraptor step-brother tried getting his nasty meat hawks in my pants last night.
My attempts to make you laugh have failed exceedingly. Naked snap chats it is
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
And I wasn't prepared because its been a very long and lonely season and I wasn't expecting to find dick at Press Box trivia night....
Dude she tried to bite my face off last night, literally. I have never actually felt like a piece of meat until that point in life...
So the door man at the local dispensary started giving me motivational talks about my beard...
Randomize
