I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Did the walk of shame past her kids. I'm younger than one of them.
Cleveland boys shit in their own pumpkins in their own living room. Got pictures to prove it.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
This wouldn't happen so much if fat girls would just stop being so damn easy.
I don't care that you fucked her. I'm offended that once again, you fucked someone with me in the room because you assumed I was asleep.
The only reason I'd ever want a boyfriend is so that someone would spoon feed me applesauce when I'm so hungover I can't move
nothing like a walk of shame in front of a cnn news crew to start the morning off right
A woman on my train just walked down the carriage in a wedding dress, crying and clutching a can of Carlsberg. Oh...
You know you come from good stock when you can have a family discussion about excuses to scam pain pills from the doctors
Things are very odd on my 29th hour of being awake. Thought there was a bird in my lecture hall and it was just a girl putting up her hair. What even
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I know how to kill a man with nutmeg and a sword. You in?
Or nah
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Randomize
