Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
I just got over my period in 3 days...I believe that is god's way of saying "go fuck an amazingly attractive Italian boy on vacation"
seriously, i am too high for the omelet station to be playing Being For The Benefit Of Mr Kite at 7am
Watching dad use Doritos to illustrate exactly where to locate the clitoris. How's your family christmas going?
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
If I had cancer, and got to make a wish, id make the organization force your dad to fuck me.
I woke up to a shattered My Little Pony garbage pail, a black eye I don't know how I got and no one will look me in the face. Fuck tequila.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
I can check masterbating in China off the bucket list.
It's official cum is not a great leave in conditioner
I'm surprised this is your first encounter with pepper spray. surprised, and somewhat proud.
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
I think I left my bra and my crocs in your room
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
You peed on a flamingo?!?
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