Do you still have your period?
MY DAD AND I ARE ON OUR WAY OUT OF FLORENCE AND I JUST SAW A MAN AT A BUS STOP WITH A GIMP HAND SLAP HIS DAUGHTER ACROSS THE FACE WITH IT.
I'm just trying to think of how much money Little Debbie would make if pot was legalized.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
You insisted on take shots off of plates.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
Sometimes you gotta take the crosseyed stripper. fuck it
Seius question. Does a penis floar when ina baht? Must find out.
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Next time you're baked eat baked beans and potato chips together. Like dip them in the beans. It's so good
shotgunning beer in rite aid bathroom. hurry
The band last night was really good
That was definitely karaoke. Guess that answers my follow up question on how drunk you were.
Somehow she talked me into getting my dick pierced, weird first date.
Think of it as a business transaction. That's how I justify all the horrible things I do. Blow my married boss? Just a business transaction.
Randomize