if you come down to my room ill tell you a secret
We had two amazing nights in a row...it was so weird...I couldn't even go to sleep cause I thought maybe it was just in his plot to kill me.
i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
I drank gravy. I actually drank gravy. This is heaven.
He gave me a 420 gift that consisted of a dime bag, a philly cheesestake, and a Pepsi that was still cold. If he ever wants a free bj, I got him.
So at what point while he was throwing up on the girl next to him did you think "yeah, im going to hit that"
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
Please check on her. She announced that Thursday she'd open herself to any veteran so as to thank them for their service. "my services for your service" and left the bar with three numbers.
I don't know how I'm gonna do that tomorrow. I feel like I was hit by the motorhome. LOL I WAS.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
wanna tell me why theres a glass of water stuffed with tamptons in the freezer?
I've literally already typed in by booty call text for friday night. all I have to do now is wait for is drunk me to press send
Boss out of town. Had 2 beers for lunch, a long walk and a bowl...and then in he comes. Blamed obvious intoxication on my pain meds. Back at the bar. This is one of those bad judgement days.
Dude. I've been high for so many hours now that I'm just accepting this as my new reality.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize