I can see my step sister's thong. Don't know if I should let myself be turned on or not
i feel like pocahontas...the disney character not from real chance of love
I had fun last night. We should have sex less often.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
I can't believe I had to convince you to not drink butter.
Where are you and who are these girls passed out on the floor?
and why are they spooning a flamingo?
they traded weed for a spot on our floor. be nice.
The usual, bring face make up, I have a weird gash on my nose, probably from my one night stand
A gay black guy with blonde hair and a gold tooth just told me he would shit on my face.
Now it's a party.
Was that you I seen riding on the top of a cab? Way to start the new year
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
Haven't sucked a dick since mid December. In crisis mode.
Am I supposed to get so horny by looking at your dick that I start orgasming uncontrollably
Would you by any chance know if there is a proper protocol for traveling with one's vibrator? I wouldn't want the TSA to rip open my suitcase in front of my boss.
You can't hold me to anything I said last night; I was drunk on orgasms.
I collect Covid conspiracy theories like I collect Pokemon.
Randomize
