and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man
bro i finally banged her last night on our basement couch
I'm at this frat party right now and yelled "my little 16 year old brother finally lost his virginity." They gave you a standing ovation
My own vomit just splashed me in the face. How's your day going
he just came in and straightened the chair and left again
help me choose which girl to send myself boning to my girlfriend to make her want to break up
which one looks the most like her?
How many weeks is it acceptable until I can start bringing freshman back?
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
he said he'd buy me TWO burritos if I took my shirt off
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
I have to remind myself to breathe. That hungover.
While he was going down town Julie brown, I was eating French fries. True Love
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
The frequency with which I change my vibrator batteries is getting a little ridiculous....
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
Randomize
