Leaving terminator. dude in front of us leaving was wearing a baggy micael vick jersey, cargo shorts and brown crocs. God I hate people.
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
My morning has consisted of lying in a fetal position, eating a whole tub of ben and jerry's, talking to my cat, and setting all of our pictures on fire. Does that answer your question?
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
about 90% sure I fell off a roof. It hurts BAD. Don't suppose you're still in town?
yup haha I infact DID fall off a roof. Want some bomb ass omlettes?
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
Does this mean I don't have to apologize for launching about 20 bead necklaces at you from the balcony?
My dad just bought me a 40. I consider this our peace treaty.
First time since we broke up that I'm not drunk before noon...win for broken hearts everywhere
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
The problem with drugs is that there's none in this hotel
The problem with drugs is that showing my boobs only gets so much of them
Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good
Guess who cheated on their SATs? Also on the same line guess who's getting in to Princeton at damn near free of charge?
Randomize
